I *loved* this post! So many things were different back when I was growing up in the 90s-early 2000s, and I had no idea people were calling it "delusional." How can they call it delusional when they didn't even exist?
Even in the 1980s and 90s, we knew where the boundaries were. Men protected women, their towns, and their neighborhoods. The strong protected the weak from bullies. It was just the way life was.
We were also better at reading nonverbal cues. If a woman wanted a man to touch her, she would look down, play with her hair, or lean in closer to him. He took that as permission and still treated her like a lady. We've lost that with all the stupid rules now.
In the 1980s and 90s, girls wore short skirts to get attention. They knew it and lived with the stares. Now, women dress like that and eviscerate men for looking at them.
Young men today don't know what to do. At the same time, I'm still very much a man of my time. I give a woman attention, smile, and shake my head when she acts offended.
Feminism has turned women into conflicted people. They want attention but are ashamed of it.
I strongly suspect our devices (living through phones) and the absence of fathers informs the inability to read cues. Without interacting in real life, boys don't know how to read if a girl is interested and the girls are repulsed if not terrified by ill-informed advances rather than just blushing at the awkwardness of it. Feminism/all men are evil discourse does contribute to this, adding mutual hostility to the mix, but it's only one element in the disastrous recipe we as a society have concocted
Men of my generation haven't changed. We understood the rules.
If the rules have changed, why did they change? Who changed them?
Men didn't suddenly think to ourselves, "We have too much testosterone. We are toxic."
I don't know about you, but I didn't say to another man, "God, your child is hyperactive. Give him drugs." I was more likely to say, "Find that kid a job or give him chores."
Men didn't suddenly decide that they had to turn into women or dress like women.
Men didn't call out other men for their sexual conquests. Women did that.
What does all that have in common? Radical Feminism.
The Radical feminist says that man is too masculine, so neuter him.
The Radical Feminist says that man needs to sit quietly and learn like a girl.
Dude, a man who speaks out against feminism is called an archaic dinosaur, that he's patriarchal and that he's misanthropic.
I've been called all that, and it doesn't bother me.
What bothers me is that men will not stand up and defend their sons and daughters from this nonsense.
There is truth to what you've said, but there is also some idealized revisionism.
Prior to the feminist movement in the US, women had little recourse for an abusive husband and few options outside the domestic sphere. Things like opening a bank account were difficult.
This would not have been an issue if men were faithful and did not abuse their power, but they did. Naturally women pushed for voting rights, economic rights and opportunities, and social acceptance of those things.
Of course nowadays this has been taken to the extreme with identity politics (weaponized victimhood), etc, but you cannot blame women for fighting to better their situation.
Critiquing feminism (or any other movement) is fine of course, but don't take what you've described as radical feminism and use that to blame women for the situation which the author has described, that is to say a loss of trust in society. I argue that men lost the trust of women first, which set the stage for feminism and put us on the trajectory to the modern day uneasy, semi-antagonistic relationship between the sexes.
You are right though, we need to be bold and the fear of criticism should not stop us from speaking out for what we think is right. However, we cannot overcome this semi-antagonistic state of affairs without also as a group regaining the trust of women, since we are the physically larger and stronger sex, and still hold some societal advantages.
Welcome to being a Libertarian: Don't hurt other people (don't initiate violence for political or social goals), and don't steal other people's stuff, but you can act to defend your rights and person.
We have become extremely lax at defining what is acceptable in contemporary society and what is not. In some ways, it has become what the hippies of the 1960s always wanted- the ability to live and exist without judgement. But in others, it involves doubling down on unachievable ideals and the belief that social status is an automatic protection against criminal sanction. And the fact that these two belief systems are in consistent conflict is what is making sure the wheels won't turn.
The hippies never noticed the unwritten social scripts they are all following, the ones that made their free love and rock and roll mentality possible. Now the high-trust society they played around with is gone and their ideals are revealed as the fantasies they are
I *loved* this post! So many things were different back when I was growing up in the 90s-early 2000s, and I had no idea people were calling it "delusional." How can they call it delusional when they didn't even exist?
Even in the 1980s and 90s, we knew where the boundaries were. Men protected women, their towns, and their neighborhoods. The strong protected the weak from bullies. It was just the way life was.
Definitely. We knew them so well, we didn’t need to say them
We were also better at reading nonverbal cues. If a woman wanted a man to touch her, she would look down, play with her hair, or lean in closer to him. He took that as permission and still treated her like a lady. We've lost that with all the stupid rules now.
In the 1980s and 90s, girls wore short skirts to get attention. They knew it and lived with the stares. Now, women dress like that and eviscerate men for looking at them.
Young men today don't know what to do. At the same time, I'm still very much a man of my time. I give a woman attention, smile, and shake my head when she acts offended.
Feminism has turned women into conflicted people. They want attention but are ashamed of it.
I wouldn't blame this change on feminism. Men also didn't uphold their end of the bargain.
I strongly suspect our devices (living through phones) and the absence of fathers informs the inability to read cues. Without interacting in real life, boys don't know how to read if a girl is interested and the girls are repulsed if not terrified by ill-informed advances rather than just blushing at the awkwardness of it. Feminism/all men are evil discourse does contribute to this, adding mutual hostility to the mix, but it's only one element in the disastrous recipe we as a society have concocted
Men of my generation haven't changed. We understood the rules.
If the rules have changed, why did they change? Who changed them?
Men didn't suddenly think to ourselves, "We have too much testosterone. We are toxic."
I don't know about you, but I didn't say to another man, "God, your child is hyperactive. Give him drugs." I was more likely to say, "Find that kid a job or give him chores."
Men didn't suddenly decide that they had to turn into women or dress like women.
Men didn't call out other men for their sexual conquests. Women did that.
What does all that have in common? Radical Feminism.
The Radical feminist says that man is too masculine, so neuter him.
The Radical Feminist says that man needs to sit quietly and learn like a girl.
Dude, a man who speaks out against feminism is called an archaic dinosaur, that he's patriarchal and that he's misanthropic.
I've been called all that, and it doesn't bother me.
What bothers me is that men will not stand up and defend their sons and daughters from this nonsense.
There is truth to what you've said, but there is also some idealized revisionism.
Prior to the feminist movement in the US, women had little recourse for an abusive husband and few options outside the domestic sphere. Things like opening a bank account were difficult.
This would not have been an issue if men were faithful and did not abuse their power, but they did. Naturally women pushed for voting rights, economic rights and opportunities, and social acceptance of those things.
Of course nowadays this has been taken to the extreme with identity politics (weaponized victimhood), etc, but you cannot blame women for fighting to better their situation.
Critiquing feminism (or any other movement) is fine of course, but don't take what you've described as radical feminism and use that to blame women for the situation which the author has described, that is to say a loss of trust in society. I argue that men lost the trust of women first, which set the stage for feminism and put us on the trajectory to the modern day uneasy, semi-antagonistic relationship between the sexes.
You are right though, we need to be bold and the fear of criticism should not stop us from speaking out for what we think is right. However, we cannot overcome this semi-antagonistic state of affairs without also as a group regaining the trust of women, since we are the physically larger and stronger sex, and still hold some societal advantages.
I think the saying goes something like "if you want peace, prepare for war"
I think I heard that somewhere too but can’t for the life of me remember where. Quite apt
It's a fairly common political slogan but I believe that it goes all the way back to a Roman consul or general.
Welcome to being a Libertarian: Don't hurt other people (don't initiate violence for political or social goals), and don't steal other people's stuff, but you can act to defend your rights and person.
We have become extremely lax at defining what is acceptable in contemporary society and what is not. In some ways, it has become what the hippies of the 1960s always wanted- the ability to live and exist without judgement. But in others, it involves doubling down on unachievable ideals and the belief that social status is an automatic protection against criminal sanction. And the fact that these two belief systems are in consistent conflict is what is making sure the wheels won't turn.
The hippies never noticed the unwritten social scripts they are all following, the ones that made their free love and rock and roll mentality possible. Now the high-trust society they played around with is gone and their ideals are revealed as the fantasies they are