"...the other person "should have known" what we really meant," - I am encountering this more and more, as you are, but not just in personal interactions; it is coming up more often in business settings, and at the management/executive level. Laziness, lack of accountability, short-term-results focus, or just a lack of caring about other people - I don't know. But it does make me sad, because these are yet more people setting examples for younger people! The corollary - because it is becoming rarer, I am so happy to meet someone who is the opposite of the "should have known" type - those who truly listen and engage with me, those with emotional intelligence - those folks never use that particular "should have known" excuse.
It’s so annoying how people presuppose who you are and what you mean based on their predetermined script. There’s no observation or analysis at all. Snap judgment exists to save our life when we need it, but now it’s become the go-to for all communication
"The freedom to fail without consequence is the greatest blessing you can give someone trying to invent."
As I've gotten older, I've also come to realize it is the greatest blessing you can give someone trying to learn.
I've been working on a similar post. I think one function of large families is that it gave people a safe place to learn and fail at social interactions free from consequences. (to an extent) Nowadays, kids are often alone in family and in social settings. So then they have no place or room to practice and learn how to deal with a social situation - like talking to the opposite sex - until there are huge, hefty consequences to them. Especially NOW. Yeah I screwed up growing up - I try not to think about them at 3am just like anybody else. But at least they are mostly my memories, and few other people even remember them. What would it be like if my worst moments were filmed and blasted onto the internet. "It's been 10 years since you made a fool of yourself in high school. Let's revisit that anniversary!" *replay video*
So yeah, I don't blame kids for not going near anybody else. It's safer than risking going viral at the worst moment in your life and having everyone you meet know you as "that moment" until the end of time.
As for dialog, I call it the "bickering" trend. "We must have drama in this scene. Make two characters argue!" "Should it be logical or in character for either one?" "No!"
If you want some comfort, check out this clip from Star Trek where two characters handle a dispute like adults.
Then go and read the comments - how much people praise and love this scene.
One thing I wish writers would realize is the old comedy rule: "Blue does not show up on blue." If you want stuff to stand out, you need contrast. This is NOT have two characters butt heads. This is about having an ebb and flow to the story. If EVERY scene, EVERY discussion is hysterical and dramatic cranked up to 11, then they ALL become dull and boring (unless it's played for laughs). You need to have calm, normal, adult discussions and then when the moment matters, THEN the high octane drama will stand out more.
Musical numbers in uh... musicals will often do this. With songs starting slow and then building up energy. But even if you have a number that starts high energy what do you do? You put a "drop" near the climax to make that contrast. Writers have got to learn that their stories are music too. There is a rhyme and rhythm to them too.
"...the other person "should have known" what we really meant," - I am encountering this more and more, as you are, but not just in personal interactions; it is coming up more often in business settings, and at the management/executive level. Laziness, lack of accountability, short-term-results focus, or just a lack of caring about other people - I don't know. But it does make me sad, because these are yet more people setting examples for younger people! The corollary - because it is becoming rarer, I am so happy to meet someone who is the opposite of the "should have known" type - those who truly listen and engage with me, those with emotional intelligence - those folks never use that particular "should have known" excuse.
It’s so annoying how people presuppose who you are and what you mean based on their predetermined script. There’s no observation or analysis at all. Snap judgment exists to save our life when we need it, but now it’s become the go-to for all communication
I clipped one of my favorite lines from a youtube review:
https://www.youtube.com/clip/UgkxMYuGBzC192NyBWvvXIQYlruQKVdNMB-S
"The freedom to fail without consequence is the greatest blessing you can give someone trying to invent."
As I've gotten older, I've also come to realize it is the greatest blessing you can give someone trying to learn.
I've been working on a similar post. I think one function of large families is that it gave people a safe place to learn and fail at social interactions free from consequences. (to an extent) Nowadays, kids are often alone in family and in social settings. So then they have no place or room to practice and learn how to deal with a social situation - like talking to the opposite sex - until there are huge, hefty consequences to them. Especially NOW. Yeah I screwed up growing up - I try not to think about them at 3am just like anybody else. But at least they are mostly my memories, and few other people even remember them. What would it be like if my worst moments were filmed and blasted onto the internet. "It's been 10 years since you made a fool of yourself in high school. Let's revisit that anniversary!" *replay video*
So yeah, I don't blame kids for not going near anybody else. It's safer than risking going viral at the worst moment in your life and having everyone you meet know you as "that moment" until the end of time.
As for dialog, I call it the "bickering" trend. "We must have drama in this scene. Make two characters argue!" "Should it be logical or in character for either one?" "No!"
If you want some comfort, check out this clip from Star Trek where two characters handle a dispute like adults.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKII3sFUCgs
Then go and read the comments - how much people praise and love this scene.
One thing I wish writers would realize is the old comedy rule: "Blue does not show up on blue." If you want stuff to stand out, you need contrast. This is NOT have two characters butt heads. This is about having an ebb and flow to the story. If EVERY scene, EVERY discussion is hysterical and dramatic cranked up to 11, then they ALL become dull and boring (unless it's played for laughs). You need to have calm, normal, adult discussions and then when the moment matters, THEN the high octane drama will stand out more.
Musical numbers in uh... musicals will often do this. With songs starting slow and then building up energy. But even if you have a number that starts high energy what do you do? You put a "drop" near the climax to make that contrast. Writers have got to learn that their stories are music too. There is a rhyme and rhythm to them too.